difficult.

Well, I'm back from the US Conference on AIDS in Palm Springs, CA. It was... ok. It was disappointingly irrelevant for what we do with our peer education program (by that I just mean that we didn't really learn anything new), but it was still inspiring and I got goosebumps about a million times listening to different speakers or people living with the virus and sharing their stories. I was glad I went, but even more glad to get home.

That being said, I did pretty well for not being able to eat on my regular schedule and not always getting the 6 meals in a day and not being able to plan out what I was going to eat... because I didn't know what I was going to eat. I tried to stick to salads and watched my portions and at least tried to get in a protein, carb, and veggie at most meals. Don't get me wrong, I slipped a couple times (there was this amazing Mexican restaurant right around the corner!!), but when we're looking at the whole picture, I did really, really good. I also stuck to the workout portion of BFL without a hitch, so that was great too.

And to prove it I've got another half inch off my waist!

However, it is a little hard getting back on track. I love having my schedule back, but it's a little easier for me to get tempted by unauthorized foods. For example, last night at my friend Betsy's house I had a few handfuls of those Hot Tamales candies. But. I realized what I was doing and moved the bowl far away from me so I wouldn't eat anymore.

I think my mindset is changing. As Skip and I almost complete our 6th week (halfway baby!), I am looking more towards the big picture of eating healthy for life instead of focusing on these 12 weeks and doing meticulously well for 12 weeks only. So I am letting myself have a handful of chewy candy, but putting them away after I know I've had enough. Or, like yesterday, when I had to stop at Schnuck's and get something from the salad bar because I forgot my lunch, and then I forgot to add a portion of carbohydrates to my lunch, I let myself have a small piece of a bagel to supplement that carbohydrate.

Body For Life has helped me to understand that I need to feed my body. I need food! So when I don't have anything near me that is technically authorized but it's time for me to eat one of my small meals, I will let myself have a small bag of pretzels or a cup of yogurt or something at least on the healthy side. Or at least not sweat it too much. Because the point of all of this is to change my eating habits so that I can stay healthy and fit for the rest of my life. Not just 12 weeks.