9.10.2008

Scared.

Since I've been pregnant, the thing that has scared me most is autism. I have no idea why. I don't really know anyone who is autistic. I'm not scared of Down's syndrome, deformities, abnormalities, cleft palate, anything like that. I'm scared of autism, and I just do not know why. I've been seeing a lot of Jenny McCarthy on TV and her stance, not against vaccinations, but the materials found in them, like high levels of mercury and aluminum. I've been reading up, and a lot of what I'm reading is scaring the crap out of me. For example, in 1983, kids got 10 vaccines in their first year. Today, kids get 36. I read yesterday that giving 7 shots to a 13 pound baby (roughly two months old) is like giving 70 doses to a 130 pound adult. Yikes.

And just as there's plenty of information out there about why not to vaccinate, or to at least spread the vaccines out over a longer period of time and starting them at two years of age instead of day one, there's just as much information about how healthy vaccines are, and how they are not related to autism in the slightest. But why are there so many more kids these days being diagnosed with the disorder?

I'm sick of wondering and worrying. I just want my girl to be safe and healthy. I don't want her to get a shot and then be sick or have something go wrong. Why do we have so many vaccines? I mean, was chicken pox really that bad? Is it totally necessary to vaccinate against? I just can't imagine all of that medicine being good. I'm really not trying to be controversial, I'm saying this with a weary and scared mind-frame. I don't know what to do.

2 comments:

Katie said...

First, through all your research, you probably saw that the risk of a girl having autism is much lower than a boy. That's good news for Story.

My cousin has autism. It's not been an easy road for my aunt and uncle in the least, but he's now in college. And, I remember being in awe with him one specific occasion when he got really really upset and calmly went to his mom and said "I need to go to my room." She took him to his room where he sat for a few minute before coming out and saying to her "I'm ready to play now." I can't even recognize in myself when I need a "time-out!" Impressive!

Jo said...

It's OK to be scared, especially with the way most stories on autism talk so much about its prevalence but really glaze over the fact that no one really knows what causes it, but that for the most part, infants born to women that are over 35 are at a higher risk for the developmental disorders like autism.

It is true that it occurs more often in boys, and some people even speculate that it is partially genetic, but I think it's a convergence of different factors that may be genetic, environmental or gestational.

One of my close friends has a 9-year-old son with autism and she thinks it has something to do with vaccines and the mercury-based preservative thimersol, but I don't think its completely to blame, nor do I think it is justifiable to inject foreign and possibly dangerous substances into a brand-new human.

Good luck with your pregnancy, and your daughter! You seem like a really great person!